I'm not a good person to write a review of a golf course. In fact, there are probably few worse than I. The reason for that is I recently played golf for the first time in 13 years since playing with a $3 rented set of clubs on a $5 18-hole course on a Navy base in Washington state... and I wasn't any good then either.

The Wizard of Odds, Mike Shackleford, invited me out for a day on the links at the Primm Valley Golf Club along with a couple of his gambling friends. I tried to clearly tell Mike how incredibly bad at golf I was, but he said not to worry about it and just come out and have fun.

As I recalled from my days in the Navy playing on military base golf courses, when I would swing at the ball there was a reasonable chance that the ball would actually go the opposite direction of my swing. Other times I would hit full strength off the tee and the ball wouldn't make it to the ladies tee.

Ah well... I couldn't weasel my way out of it; Mike wouldn't let me. He just said to make sure to wear a collared shirt and no blue jeans and I'd be fine.

After a 30 to 40 minute drive to Primm we crossed the state line into California and arrived at the course. I wasn't aware that the course was actually in California. We were humorously reminded when commencing the round that the course was not in Nevada so no wagering while playing. Uh huh.

Here's me and Mike starting off the day...



After making a 14 and picking up without finishing my putting on the first hole, I then realized that somehow I hadn't magically improved at golf in the 13 years of complete absence from the game. Funny how that works. I had Mike write me down for a 16 but who knows what I would have actually gotten.

On the second hole I got a solid 14, meaning I actually putted the ball into the hole in 14 strokes. That was gratifying.

I know you may be asking what the par for the holes was, but with a 16 and a 14 does it really matter?

I did settle down a little making 7s, 8s, and 9s on a few holes, and on one par 3 hole I had about a 5-footer for par, but I just lipped the corner of the cup. That would have made my day. Of course, I then 2-putted from there for a 6 on the hole.

At one point I was admonished by a staff member of the course because you're supposed to use the cart path only on all the par 3 holes, and holes 1, 4, and 16. Well, I drove the cart on the grass of a par 3 hole and I got a talking to. Live and learn.

So as you can see, I can't tell you a whole lot about the quality of the course since I'm not knowledgeable about that. I can tell you that I got a sandwich and a beer, and when I went to hit a ball from the fairway, a crow started eating my sandwich. I can tell you that the scenery was beautiful and the staff was pleasant, courteous and helpful. Any more questions?

Here are a couple more pics:



Here's a look at the course and mountains from the clubhouse. Not a very exciting picture I know, but I think that crow flying is the one that ate my sandwich.



Here's Mike Shackleford juggling 4 golf balls at the same time. Many might not know this, but he is an avid juggler and unicycler, and also the guy that came up with the Most Popular Baby Names list put out each year by the Social Security Administration.

If you really want the scoop on Las Vegas golf courses, pick up a copy of Golf Las Vegas which is available in both a printed and e-book format.

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