No Sh!t, Sherlock Dept.

“Motorists are advised to expect delays or find an alternate route.” — Clark County‘s considered opinion of the proper response to a drastic narrowing of the Strip, ending (we hope) Nov. 27. Is this advice likely to be heeded? Not very. Are we in for the greatest clusterfuck known to mankind? Let’s just say Strip motorists and commuters had best steep thine souls in infinite amounts of patience. They’ll need it.

From  the ColSux file: You know McDonald’s is scraping the bottom of the legal barrel when it cites the human resources policies of Columbia Sussex to excuse strip-searching and sexually assaulting an employee (or at least justify the corporate negligence that made the incident possible). ColSux’s great moment in due process was as follows:

“In Columbia Sussex, a hotel was robbed and circumstances led management to believe the robber was aided by an employee. A number of employees, including Hay, were asked to take a lie detector test.

“Hay inquired of [the hotel’s president] what would happen if they did not take the test. His answer was that they could leave, indicating that their jobs would be lost. Ultimately, each employee who was called took the polygraph examination. At the time that the tests were administered, each, including Mrs. Hay, signed a paper which acknowledged that the subject was taking the test under neither coercion nor duress. Mrs. Hay’s testimony is that she did indeed submit under duress inasmuch as her job rested on such and that she informed the polygraph operator that her only lie was that she was taking it without coercion. The operator was not called.

“Columbia Sussex at 273. Quoting William L. Prosser, Handbook on the Law on Torts, § 11, pp. 44-45 (4th ed. 1971), we said, “Moral pressure, as where the plaintiff remains with the defendant to clear himself of suspicion of theft . . . is not enough.” Columbia Sussex at 277-78. We applied that concept to Mrs. Hay.”

In other words, consent was all that mattered, regardless of the implicit punishment with which it was extracted. Stay classy, ColSux. A lonely nation turns its eyes to you.