What can the Blackjack dealer say?

     Suppose a player sits down at a table and starts playing.  After about 10 minutes he tells the dealer his son is getting married in 4 hours but doesn't want to attend since he doesn't like the future daughter-in-law.  Can/should the dealer say:

     You should cash out now and leave, go to it anyway.  It's a once in a lifetime event. There's always time for blackjack later.  

     OR:  That's up to you, sir.

     OR:  Oh forget that, stay, you're winning every hand....

     Maybe the response would be different were the dealer male or female?  Or if there are other players at the table who might offer their input?   

     Bottom line:are dealers trained on what they can or can't say to players?  After all, people talk and not just asksing if they should hit 16 against the dealer's 10.

               Tim

"That's up to you, sir" seems to be the most reasonable response ( and ultimately true in this example). I think anything they're trained towards outside of game rules and etiquette would be geared toward neutral responses with customers / players. Of course free speech would allow them to cross those lines while hoping to keep their jobs. 

I put my money on...a bit of blackjack humor!  Right, Tim?

Candy

Actually, no, dealers and other casino employees have been fired on the spot--thousands of times--for saying something their immediate bosses found "inappropriate." The thing is, Nevada is one big casino company town. Job situations where a mistreated employee might have recourse are common everywhere, except Nevada. The state agencies, the courts, etc. will all side with the casinos. Every time. You, the dealer, are a disposable work unit. Nothing more.

This sort of thing can be terribly capricious. I have a vivid memory of dealing blackjack while the keno numbers were being drawn. The caller, who was evidently a very new employee, called out "81" as a numbered ball came up; she evidently misread it because it was upside down from her point of view. I looked up in surprise, because there are only 80 Keno balls/numbers. The floor manager also reacted in surprise and RAN over to the keno counter. He fired the girl on the spot, as she was calling the remainder of the numbers! She left the floor in tears. (This was at the Pepto Bismol Palace in Vegas, aka Circus Circus.)

I always joked with the players, tried to show them a good time, and even gave out advice if they asked for it. BUT...we had been told straight up to be very neutral in our interactions, like robots. Like pretty much every "ironclad rule," whether that was enforced or even paid attention to depended on your immediate boss's personality; and that might depend on whether he had gotten laid last night. I achieved job security by buttering the fat bastard like a country biscuit. I even went to the trouble of learning about his favorite football teams so I could talk with him about their players and fortunes. My reward was that I was never admonished or even bothered re my player interactions; hell, I probably could have punched a customer in the face without repercussions, as long as my boss, Gutboy Barrelhouse, was at the pit podium.

There are always rules, usually stated quite clearly, re how to talk to players and what not to say. I think that in the situation posed, the most neutral answer would be the safest. However, I would have said something like, "You have to be there, so when the priest asks if anyone objects to this marriage or forever hold their peace, you can speak up." Gutboy would have cracked up.

       So you "sucked up" to your boss to gain favor - why am I not surprised.....

... 

And you took this opportunity to say something nasty...outside the Sink...just like you always do. I'm definitely not surprised.

I feel very, very sorry for the few people who are forced to interact with you...assuming there are any left.

Sorry, folks, Miller jumped in and ruined another thread. Tim, yours was a good question, and yes, dealers are and always have been told what they should and shouldn't say to players. Sometimes it's pretty formally spelled out; other times, it's more of a general admonition. Dealers will almost always err on the side of caution and try to respond neutrally to whatever a customer says--after all, part of the job is dealing with people who are drunk, angry, depressed, or deliriously happy. It's a minefield.