Damn those Chinese restaurants!!!

Big cities have high crime rates.

Big cities have lots of Chinese restaurants.

Clearly, as any right-minded right-winger can see, Chinese restaurants cause crime. Because correlation IS causation!

As further proof--as if more proof were needed--the town of Goober Falls, Kansas (population: 26) reported NO violent crime in 2021---and it has no Chinese restaurants!!! Q! E! D! 

BTW, Chicago has LOTS of Chinese restaurants, though Boiler tells us that that guy holding the defund the police sign made them all shut down.

I got a better one for you, and it's the absolute truth!

In major US cities, as the consumption of ice cream increases, the number of murders increases.

(At this point Boilerman is trying to figure out if ice cream causes murder or if murder causes people to eat ice cream. Sad!)

Ice cream is so "Liberal."

Chocolate sundaes. Kung pao chicken. Critical race theory being taught to cats. When will this madness end???