To celebrate and commemorate the demise of "The worst human being in American history," President Newsom announced that March 29 would henceforth be a national holiday, which he said "marked the end of a national nightmare, like the end of the Civil War or V-J Day."
America was delighted when on that date in 2028, Trump was holding a hate rally with his dwindling but still faithful supporters to try to boost his 12% approval rating. A protestor worked her way to the front of the crowd and unfurled a banner that read, "AMERICA HATES YOU." Trump spluttered in anger, shouted, "Fuck you, Piggy," waved his arms at his ICE agents in the crowd to arrest that woman, and lost his balance. He fell from the podium into the crowd, where he was impaled on the sharpened post holding a supporter's "I WANT TO HAVE YOUR BABY, GLORIOUS LEADER!" sign. The wound was quickly fatal, and his last words were, "It's all Biden's fault."
Newsom observed that Vice President Vance becoming President had sealed the Republican party's doom, as they had had no choice but to make him their new Presidential candidate (they had been ordered to nominate Trump for a third term). The Democrats seized control of the Senate and retained control of the House, as Vance garnered 22% of the popular vote and lost in every state except North Dakota.
Newsom also announced the DeTrumpification Policy, wherein every act, decree, executive order, treaty violation, judicial appointment, or elevation to office enacted by Trump would be canceled or reversed. All buildings with his name on them would be renamed. His two portraits in the White House were replaced by reproductions of Edward Munch's "The Scream." And every US currency note with Trump's signature on it was declared to be invalid after January 31. (They could be traded in for, as Newsom put it, "real money. ')
Nations throughout the world poured in their congratulations, with the exception of Israel and Russia. Even Iran sent Newsom their well wishes, while vowing to "wipe Israel off the map" in retaliation for their Trump-sanctioned nuclear attack on Tehran, which had killed 2:million people.
All Trump tariffs were canceled, and every tariffed nation rescinded its reciprocal tariffs as well. Consumer prices are expected to drop by 20 percent. Experts predicted a drop in gasoline prices from the $17.45 per gallon national average when Vance left office to the prices at the end of Biden's term.
The 257,500 inmates of the Trump Immigrant Gulag have been released. Sadly, there were over 100,000 deaths there during the time the camp was in ooeration, from starvation, disease, and neglect.
The Epstein Memorial Rape Camp was shut down and its records seized by the FBI.
MAGA suicides have been estimated at 1,500,000 nationwide. The most popular method has been to impale oneself on a sharpened stick, to, as in a note left by one suicide, "show solidarity with our fallen Noble Glorious Leader."
All government employees fired by Elon Musk and DOGE in 2025 were given back pay and the opportunity to have their old jobs back. Taxpayers will be allowed to deduct tariffs paid in the last four years from their tax liability. In the first act of Congress, the "Big Beautiful Bill" was repealed, and tax rates on the rich were restored to their pre-2018 levels. Newsom noted that this would wipe out Trump's $11:trillion deficit.
America is rejoicing.