CRACKER HOLLOW, KY: A local homeowner caught a liberal trespassing on his property and exercised his Second Amendment rights, filling the varmint full of lead and passing righteous judgment on him. The trespasser was dead on the scene.
The man was initially shot twice in Elmer Tater's driveway, after he parked his car in front of Mr. Tater's house and walked onto his property. The shots were not immediately fatal, and Mr. Tater approached the man as he lay wounded and demanded to know why he was trespassing. The man, witnesses said, claimed that he was only there to deliver a summons. saying that one of Tater's ex-wives was suing him and he had court papers to deliver. Tater became upset at this and shot the man six times in the head.
Mr. Tater employed a Winchester bolt-action rifle for his initial shots, and used a .357 Magnum to finish the righteous apprehension of the criminal who had violated his property. He used hollow-point ammunition and high-velocity rifle shells. All of the above equipment and ammo can be purchased at Friendly Fern's Gun Shop and Feed Store.
When local police arrived, they briefly interviewed Mr. Tater and were about to take him down to the station for questioning when one of them noticed a BIDEN bumper sticker on the criminal trespasser's car. At that point, it was determined that no charges would be filed against Mr. Tater.
