The Turd woke up this morning at 3 am and discovered that he had shat the bed in his sleep. He immediately screamed for his keepers to fetch Steven Miller and Kristi Noem so they could clean him up with their tongues. When ten minutes went by and neither showed up, he flew into a rage and announced on Lies Social that his new illegal Turdiffs were 15%, increased from 10%. Fox Nooze immediately issued a statement praising their "wise and noble Dear Leader's masterful new tariffs that will bring magnificent prosperity to everybody who voted for him."
Meanwhile, businesses around the world and in the US are trying to figure out how to conduct trade when the cost of doing so changes daily according to the Orange Pig's bowel movements and how angry he is at the world.
The day is fast approaching when no one will want to trade with us at all. Unbelievably, that is the Turd's goal: no trade with anyone. He actually thinks --to the extent that he thinks at all --that that would be bigly wonderful.