Diamond Vegas Summer 2011 ECLVA
Holy Crap, did I have fun!!
SATURDAY JULY 30th
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Won my first gamble by going to JFK early to get an early flight on Jetblue.
New Norman (N.N.) drove me in his sisters caddy but it had no air and I was soaked but knowing I was getting there at 7pm instead of 9:30pm was thrilling.
CLV came to meet me/bring me to room. We went to IN&Out before hitting Rio. Rio was booked solid, she had to circle and hunt for parking while I checked in. I got Masquerade Tower 36012. I had 5 minutes to unpack and look for bed bugs (found nothing) before we drove to Palms (why all the traffic?!?) to meet T.B. He was playing LOTRs- we got our self designed T-shirts and I lost $200.00 in dollar VP and nickel 10-play in a cigarettes time.
Lost another hundy before deciding tomorrow is another day.
Bed ,midnight. How did I stay up?
SUNDAY! July 31.
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- up at 5am—I really liked my Rio room , slept w/ the drapes wide open/ great Strip view– I swiped StuMerrians HET card for the great race winning $72.00 on The Hangover which is like Sex in the City but more fun… I also hit for $60.00 on a double Final Offer—who wins at Rio?!? I do.
Kip/Catherine is staying here too and we meet at Valet for Bum to pick us up for Red Rock Canyon walk—we didn’t walk—Bum blew a tire..guess who was the ONLY one who had updated her roaming capabilities when she landed!?!!? Hmmm??? Yep; The Blonde.
I was the only one getting reception so called AAA and Sinow.
Bum was ..well…bummed but we got the tire changed and Kip and I walked some while waiting. It was never scary except when I was cranking the jack and the car shifted in the sand/ dirt. The donut tire was 14 years old but held… Oopsy ll ! Bum had never had a flat. I took a very unflattering photo of him.
Back to civilization,
we forewent the Rio for Gold Coast- me forgetting to put TB’s name on my Rio room. I played FP and the wheel deluxe in a hypnotic state for an hour while the crew ate buffet til I looked at my phone seeing 2 missed calls from BUM- Oh My—I RAN to Rio (Oopsy) in the rain.
Feed me! Drove to Orleans to the café where I had a lovely tomato basil creamy soup and shrimp salad..The line was long to pay so I left cash.
The plan was to get to Palms for TB 1:30 for ECLVA brunch…I wasn’t eating. Bum did the official hand off of me to CLV. (I should be watched at all times)
I kept sneaking in the Mex. Place to have some watermelon when CLV texted me to COME/LOOK!—Saw a $6,700 wheel hit and a lady got dealt heart royal on 5-play $5.00 for $100,000.00- right by me-I took photos.
I was playing pennies when I heard the slot tech call it good…45 minutes later after dismantling the machine.
We lost there..
Drove to I.P (Parked at Harrah’s) to get ticket for Human Nature-CLV gave me her tix for Dennis & Judy.. the rest of the EC crew will showed up.
played at Harrah’s- noticed TB was playing LOTR’s because I couldn’t on my card- so I logged in a new name. The new 2 Towers is cheap.
It got to be 4pm but CLV was having too much fun so I did the D.L. myself and texted Bum to join me- it was horrible wings, some weird pressed hamburger meat sticks, nuts, toast and celery—I drank two cappuccinos, 2 PERRIER’S, BURYING THE NUTS IN A SIDE ZIPLOCK- OOPS CAP LOCK. ~~sheesh, God awful food. People come there to drink I guess.. it ain’t no Atlantic City, that fer sure. :>(
Bum showed. He was Margaritaed so no beer. CLV was hypnotized by a VP machine. We left for I.P. and I got my fun on dime Ultimate X and Double STP- Hit a deuces royal for 800 ($80)
Played Alice- the 4 sets window one- got 2 bonus rounds- cashed even/ those things will hurt you!
We came up w/ “ the Vortex(t)” which is short for Voice Of Reason text – TB said something about cashed out or holding on to my win- I said “well thank you for that sage advise, voice of reason”…
later he texted me some other big brotherly nonsense in case I got hypnotized-a V.O.R. text.. you maybe had to be there.
Human Nature ruled and rocked- we sat w/ Judy and Dennis- no one else came to our table. It’s a great show and our gang stayed outside after it was over while Bob Row tried to get me to bring the MPT monkey to the H.N. guys for a photo.
Rob took my card to Tahoe or somewhere- thanks, Rob
We goofed around at Harrah’s..Which means I played, he watched. I found what interested CLV for hours..it’s a secret but it’s radical.
Back to Rio and bed by 11:30pm.
MONDAY AUGUST 1
_________________________ I see The MPT was Sunday -- do not trust anything I say she said mistakenly
No walk Waaaaaaaaa- or maybe we did. I think we did walk.Casinoed ??? there are no notes
Moved to Orleans.
Room 1723 which, I was informed; is all prime numbers (ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzz)
I don’t have notes for Monday but we did run into Bard and Maggie at Orleans- I had very little time to get ready for the MPT. Meanwhile the sink clogged, the lights went out in the bathroom and I needed at LEAST 2 more pillows. Oh and the air was on full blasted with the knob not working so best I could do was close the drapes and shove the easy chair against the thing…. 2 flat, old, worn, dead little body towels.. GRRRRR.
I am not complaining I am just telling you..it was fine as I was not there and fell into bed each night. I like the place but more so because Bard and Bum were there and it saved them from getting me each morning.
This was the day of WSOP..wait~~~~
I mean, the MPT.. at Palazzo.
Bard and Maggie came w/ us (the morning and early afternoon is a black out to me.) MPT was 3pm but STARTED AT 4PM- RowanB caught me taking his sewing kit but Gawd was I bored after 20 minutes. We had Jackie as cocktail waitress and Harv as Master of ceremonies. I had a tip for Sinow and got to hug and kiss Bob (I think he hates it) Lucky for me, I was seated by the snacks to shut me up.
I went out first (3rd time so I am constant ) It's a garunteed prize.. girls of Golden gate calendar! score!
Couldn’t wait to smoke in the casino—found a nice quarter STP/ got a 3X multiplier and hit quads so used that money to play w/- cost me $20.00- They were up there 4 hours.
Came back and rescued Maggie. We walked the shopping area and played at Jimmy Choo’s ignoring the sale ladies knowing damn well we were not buyers. Every sales person was standing around.
I touched everything. (The beige suede’s for Fall are to die for) Later, in our travels we both saw a class act hooker wearing them at Cosmo.
Monday night is a blur- again no notes.
I broke even Sunday and Monday and was THRILLED. I do remember walking by a penny machine I’d never seen w/ Bum ahead of me and saying WAIT! Aztec Cows?!? I MUST play these Aztec cows/how could you not?!?- they’re COWS!!!!
And hit for $366.22 when almost the whole screen filled up w/ them on the 3rd spin.- never saw that type of machine before or after (at Orleans)
Orleans was great at wake up calls- I got one –
TUESDAY
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for 5am to meet Bard downstairs at nickel triple progressive which was $6,1XX.XX- no win. Bum was running a little late (burning the candle at both ends, Bum??!?)
We had a great walk, it’s so clean and beautiful out there, almost chilly at 6:45 am.
Bum Bard and Mags to Pawn Stars or Aliante to see Sue. I think the first thing she said was “Where’s Noahcat!?!?”…lol.
Bum drops me at 10:30 to Flamingo where I check in and get times for a slot tourney w/ CLV---Room 11080 w/ a nice Bellagio fountain view amid the tiny spots of Donny and Marie but you could see thru the window- don’t know how.
We messed the room up, ate my red licorice, drove to Cosmo via Bellagio—We checked at the slot club- they have extended the $100.00 FP to August - I asked kind of wise cracky “and what if I win?”
She said “Come back tomorrow..”
Oh really!?!?
They couldn’t be nicer.
I played $2.50 a pop on Little Shop of Horrors- I got a great bonus round for $277.45. (There are two right in front by windows by the Strip..)
I stopped playing- CLV lost and the FP is good for one whole year!
We just made the 1:30PM Gold Coast Meet and we weren’t first even. I got a table for 20 at the noodle bar and chatted w/ Slowpoke whom I adored and Judy showed up w/ her butt-plug trophy for MPT Bowling- Sat near Kip and CLV w/ Jon Terry and Bum near me- FEED ME SEYMOUR! I mixed up the tea w/ the soy sauce… shitballs. It was fun, food was good and well attended after goodbyes I just had to play those Deluxe Wheel w/ cheese on deuces- and got the wheel 5-play w/ 3 to the royal on dimes- well the royal filled in and everyone came one by one- two by two to see my $400.00 Royal.
I cashed $547.30 and tried the Rockin Olives which is heck-a-fun too- it’s the new Queen machine but way better…
Broke even on that.
Still early, CLV and I went to Cannery to see Sue Casey—she found me playing .02 cent 10-play Ultimate X—lost $100.00. We lost CLV to the Wheel Poker- we both played on her card.
Sue and I fell into a DREAMCARD trance. Nothing was paying. We were there til 7-ish. I lost $300.00 but got my low rolling on. Cindy got aces for $200.00- finally!
Sue has books for me and we hugged goodbye.. we were leaving when CLV spotted a sonic across the street- which meant I got instantly hungry which is so crazy cuz I know Sue has comps and the Victory
Café is good food! But we got dogs w/ chili and onion rings, CLV likes to drive into her food and drink (Dwinks)
—drove to Orleans, run into Bum walking into Orleans ( what are the odds?!?) He was off to somewhere.
CLV and I played wheel poker and quick quads- (shut up V.O.R Text) they only have them at the .25 cent level but I got dealt Q.Q.’s twice playing 5-play and some surprises surfing in the machine but tis a heady ride so I cashed at $616.00 and was thrilled. CLV outlasted me but not for long- I had to baled, bathing takes time….
Bed 11pm.
Bum wants to leave at 6am- crazy man…. LIEUtenant Dan!
Lieutenant DA-AN!—Bums’ good for a Forest Gump impression.
WEDNESDAY
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Bard comes w/ and again and major wonderful magical walk… not another living soul and the timing was perfect- earlier is better.
Bum needs to check in. I insist.
I have to hurry to be at Flamingo by 10:30—I am down in the casino when Bum texts me this : “come 2 door”
Er, um—there is no door in casino.
Open! He says
“Not in room” I text back—apparently, he grabbed 2 fluffy towels off a maid cart and knocked on the wrong door (1423 I think) in a boomin’ voice saying “Madam, Your Cabana boy is here..” LOL Nice thought/wrong room, Bum…
Helen Keller said of Mark Twain “Great Men are usually mistaken about themselves”
I get there (Flamingo right on time) got back to back sessions- I tank.. CLV scores the highest both times up and down the aisles- I checked.. I sucked.
I decided Maggie needed to see Human Nature- she doesn’t walk, she doesn’t gamble much, she’s a good egg, she loves Motown and this is her vacation too
OK, so CLV doesn’t want to walk or get sweaty-got the voucher at Flamingo while dissuading the person in front of me to not go to H.N. try The Impressionists..Legends Hey!..there is a Mean Michael Jackson..you’ll love it! Boothing telle me to get the tix seating locked in ASAP, we use the room (to potty) and get in the car—she back doors to Harrah’s and drops me off telling me to go up one floor- and I am instantly LOST in a hot parking garage- I blank. I am stunned like a slaughterhouse cow- I text her..”I am completely LOST! Help!” , not moving but the heat forces me in an elevator- thank God some 6th sense tells me to hit Monorail- and I venture out to the IP crossing- scared to death.. panic attack adrenaline floods my brain..I need a watcher at all times!!!!
Race to the box office, got seats- mission accomplished – CLV texts me she’s in Harrah’s (WTF!?!?) I text back U R PLAYING?!?!?
I’ll never find her now. Turns out she was Iphoning some e-mails waiting for me by the Mist-ers—never so glad to see anyone in my life (OK, well..not counting Sinow a mile away from Red Rock Canyon entrance)
We went right to Bellagio again for lunch w/ Barb, Matthew and Dan (FedoMalley) we had 12 minutes to play. I got a $145.00 quad on the 10 coin quarter progressive along w/ many straights and full houses cashing $245.00 before Olives.
Lump Crab salad, and those amazing Butternut squash torteli’s~~~~ yum—on the patio which was hot but lovely- I went to the ladies room to put toilet paper in my bra as sweat was pouring down between my breasts/belly slick (ick, I know)
It was 104 with no breeze and now i'm eating pasta. Once in a while the air condition from inside would sneak out and I'd go "Oh, wow.. dija feel that?"
—Later, I find out CLV did the same only in her butt crack as she has Kathy Griffin butt sweat.
We are so classy…huh? LMAO
Matthew gets 3 scoops of ice cream.
Meanwhile,
Barb ask where I was staying next (South Point) , got out her S.P. card, called her host and got me a suite for the two nights… OMG OMG! Thank you..OMG!
We parted thanking them for lunch and cooled down in the casino. I got dealt Aces w/ a 5, the drawn card was a 6. Machine locked up for $400.00
so I moved to the next machine and got aces w/ a kicker for $1,000 holding 2 aces.
Whoo-Hoo and
Holy Moley!!!
Now CLV’s machine gave her a quad too- all I know is I walked out of there with $1,6XX.00 more than I walked in with and a full happy belly.
Off to M- I suckered myself in to a Moroccan Hair Event at 4pm. I’m a Spa gal, not a Salon girl but they were giving a Louis Vuitton travel bag of Moroccan Hair Products away at the end I JUST KNEW I would win it- Bard was coming to get the HN Tix.
CLV and I had FP-- and my hair was a weeks worth of smoke, Red Rock sweat and oil—Anthony took me in- it cost $60.00 and I had to tip but I got Star hair and was allowed to pick out a full size Moroccan product.
Meh.
I will tell you the shampoo chairs are leather and have lumbar massagers in them…but hair is hair and I won’t ever do it again. CLV left and TB was in the Poker room-
I roamed around playing Double STP dimes and looking for sweet penny hits until Bum text me “what’s your pleasure” ..Hmm what IS my pleasure?!?
I got hungry and we settled on washing up and driving to Sunset Station.
The advantaged play/deal here was senior points and the POV/MRB $25.00 coupon for spending $50.00 at the steak house but my patience was wearing thin going to the rewards center to check on poionts, the bathroom to wash up and the steakhouse to learn we now had to go to the gift shop (Never seen it before.. Sunset has a gift shop!?!) to purchase a gift card for $25.00 and it would have $50.00 on it and ....well, ....I blew w/ all the steps involved..
God F-ing Damn it! Why don’t they just tell us to bring them the broom of the wicked witch!?!?~~ Dance, monkey, Dance!! I am screaming to no one in particular..
Bum points to a STP machine and tells me to sit and play while he goes through the hoops for us.
After a smoke and winning $48.00 I found my manners and my Zen center but I warned the waiter I was on the edge.
He heard me.
The Service was impeccable as was the food. Petite Filet butterflied, charred Pittsburg style w/ spinach sautéed w/ garlic while Bum got everything the waiter suggested: twice baked potato and bone in rib eye, onion soup to start.
Burp.
Everything was divinely graced.
Alice gave me $344.77- Holy Wonderland!!/ I picked all the right tea pots. We played some LOTRs and penny 10-play poker. Bum scouted for some machines Maggie liked. Back at Orleans the nickel trip progressive stands at $6,600.
THURSDAY AUGUST 4th
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Orleans Breakfast w/ Bard, Maggie and Bum. Gamble- lose.
Pack up for South Point. Stand in ridiculous line at South Point helping a Jersey couple form their day. I wasn’t able to cancel my standard room so we all used it for luggage while I plundered the bath products. We Bum-mobiled to Cosmo where again I won $209.00 on Little Shop Of Horrors. Saw Bard go batshit on some ignorant slot manager- He was tense and steaming but the ladies at the slot club knew what they were doing and smoothed his ruffle feathers we all played in the free slot tourney- Maggie was the top winner, I came in second for $25.00 and Bum’s machine broke so they gave him $10.00 in FP. (Figures, huh?) LOL
We all made money,
The parking there is lovely and civil- with red lights for full and green lights for empty and numbers of how many spots are available on each floor. Going and parking there is an event in itself..
Off to Ellis Island where we taught Bard and Maggie the game of Quick Quads- both Bard and Maggie won and quickly cashed. Bum got us all root beer. First and last time there for me. Ick. The next day Bum went back to use our FP—howja do Bum???
Back to S.P.—where I ignore the line and get my SUITE from Barb- top floor/ wider hallways room 2547- O’ MY!!! Kitchen, living room, dining room ,4 TVs!, turn the corner into a heavenly inset ceiling lighting, giant bedroom w/ Boise radio and huge 4 poster dream bed- marble bathroom the size of my Brooklyn apartment Bathroom w/ 2 or 3 doors (Toilet/ shower) / ginormous rounded tub, - I dance, I am THRILLED- Text everyone to meet here. Bum finds a jazz channel while I spread my stuff out- oh I want to use that bathtub!
Starving-
we go early to Gaetanos, salad, spaghetti and meat balls, crab-stuffed salmon (The grown-ups had wine) this place is consistently wonderful. Thanks to Bard and Bum.
XOXOXOOXXO TO MEN WHO FEED ME.
Decided to only play on TB’s card-- Never had a S.P. card- I can wait. TB will get tons of offers.
Hit a Chili Pepper penny machine for $279.00—Saw a woman hit for $3,000.00 on a penny machine..amazing!
I wasn’t winning and only wanted to jump around in that heavenly room so I baled- Bum went to find Bigfus downtown- I luxuriated in my SUITE/ played w/ all the lighting, robes and slippers- bath was as good as I thought it would be. Fluffy towels aplenty/ bath salts Ahhhhhhhhh
I caught a Larry David show before crossing over to the land of Nod- I felt like the princess and the pea- or Goldie Locks for this bed and this room was “jest right”- and the Boise alarm went off at 5am w/o my knowledge or permission-
You know the bed was so heavenly, that I turned it off after finding my glasses, the remote and climbed right back into bed sleeping til 6:30am?! Yay!
good for me.
Turn on my phone and RowanB has sent a photo of a diamond royal w/ the text : (Had to go back to AC to get a Royal) I take comfort in I am the sanest of my ECLVA group..
Bard was texting me- I was suppose to buy him a cup of coffee but let me tell you I put on 3 miles running around that suite- everything I needed was in another room. My hair goes in a pony tail and did I wash my face?
He says go to Seattle’s Best and turn around- he’ll be at the ATM.
Not Good.
Found him, he got ducks but still in a hole..we took a shot at Quick Quads w/ a cheesy wheel- nope. No luck.
Bum and Maggie came for free buffet- it was food. I didn’t like it. I couldn’t saw the bottom English muffin of my eggs Benedict but free is free.. I was tired but the impending doom of leaving tonight was clear on my mind.
Bum and Bard played LOTR- both cashed a Big Win (a big win is over $20.00) the bonuses are awesome, still love the Prancing Pony best
Showed Maggie Alice in Wonderland and caught 2 bonuses cashing out $198.75 on a twenty.
I semi-packed…boo-hoo-hoo..
Bum wanted to go to Cosmo to do more FP and tourney—so we did. We played LOTRs and I cashed $147.00 after almost burning through the whole hundy. (You have to score 100 points daily to enter) Cake walk.
As much as they tried to get more people in the tourney- there was only 3 of us , I was in the lead but Bum pulled ahead at the last 3 seconds.
Bum WON! Apparently, it’s upside down day then (LOL)
He takes $50.00 I take $25.00 in FP and we both cash playing Bonus poker to the good.
We toured the Spa and tennis courts, saw the tourney director waiting by some convention to applauded someone- there is amazing humoristic and wondrous Art scatter about everywhere at Cosmo.
We were going to Gold coast but took a drive to Buzz BBQ- where I ate more than Bum did. It was awesome.. Brisket and rib tips- w/ restaurant.com voucher it came to under $20.00.
My notes end here. I had til 8:30. I got aces on STP at G.C.- watched a new bonus round on Rockin Olives—Bum rushed me back to S.P. where I HAD to try that shower and refresh—packed, forced myself to leave Maggie bath products (LOL) and gave this amazing Suite up to Bard and Maggie- they’ll stay here tonight. Bard had set my sox monkey in the Penn & Teller fish bowl w/ a sign Bad Monkey.
They went back to Gaetanos for dinner again.
We played downstairs w/ no great hits. I played some 3-card and Life of Luxury hitting 2 bonus rounds.
Phooey- Bum waits by TSA. We share some popcorn and review the trip.
I brought back much more than I came with. More is good.
Bum mailed me back some stuff I accrued over the week.
I got it already
Walking in Red Rock was amazing- it’s really a joy. Friends make the vacation shared sweeter/can’t imagine doing Vegas on my own. Who would I high five?
South Point rules.
Sinows Rescue N Recovery rules, pretty sure you’ll make the T-shirt sponsorship next year, a solid bet.
10 coin quarters at Bellagio rule.
CLV’s drive-thru food & drink rule rocks.
Seeing Sue is always good.
Being Diamond rules too- insures a coffee-maker.
Bum ,
this is for you:
Apparently,
Alex Trebek injured his Achilles heel while chasing a thief who’d stolen cash, jewelry from his hotel room- No thanks to Watson who just stood by processing the whole thing.
Supercomputer, my a$$ :>)
Holy Crap, did I have fun!!
SATURDAY JULY 30th
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Won my first gamble by going to JFK early to get an early flight on Jetblue.
New Norman (N.N.) drove me in his sisters caddy but it had no air and I was soaked but knowing I was getting there at 7pm instead of 9:30pm was thrilling.
CLV came to meet me/bring me to room. We went to IN&Out before hitting Rio. Rio was booked solid, she had to circle and hunt for parking while I checked in. I got Masquerade Tower 36012. I had 5 minutes to unpack and look for bed bugs (found nothing) before we drove to Palms (why all the traffic?!?) to meet T.B. He was playing LOTRs- we got our self designed T-shirts and I lost $200.00 in dollar VP and nickel 10-play in a cigarettes time.
Lost another hundy before deciding tomorrow is another day.
Bed ,midnight. How did I stay up?
SUNDAY! July 31.
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- up at 5am—I really liked my Rio room , slept w/ the drapes wide open/ great Strip view– I swiped StuMerrians HET card for the great race winning $72.00 on The Hangover which is like Sex in the City but more fun… I also hit for $60.00 on a double Final Offer—who wins at Rio?!? I do.
Kip/Catherine is staying here too and we meet at Valet for Bum to pick us up for Red Rock Canyon walk—we didn’t walk—Bum blew a tire..guess who was the ONLY one who had updated her roaming capabilities when she landed!?!!? Hmmm??? Yep; The Blonde.
I was the only one getting reception so called AAA and Sinow.
Bum was ..well…bummed but we got the tire changed and Kip and I walked some while waiting. It was never scary except when I was cranking the jack and the car shifted in the sand/ dirt. The donut tire was 14 years old but held… Oopsy ll ! Bum had never had a flat. I took a very unflattering photo of him.
Back to civilization,
we forewent the Rio for Gold Coast- me forgetting to put TB’s name on my Rio room. I played FP and the wheel deluxe in a hypnotic state for an hour while the crew ate buffet til I looked at my phone seeing 2 missed calls from BUM- Oh My—I RAN to Rio (Oopsy) in the rain.
Feed me! Drove to Orleans to the café where I had a lovely tomato basil creamy soup and shrimp salad..The line was long to pay so I left cash.
The plan was to get to Palms for TB 1:30 for ECLVA brunch…I wasn’t eating. Bum did the official hand off of me to CLV. (I should be watched at all times)
I kept sneaking in the Mex. Place to have some watermelon when CLV texted me to COME/LOOK!—Saw a $6,700 wheel hit and a lady got dealt heart royal on 5-play $5.00 for $100,000.00- right by me-I took photos.
I was playing pennies when I heard the slot tech call it good…45 minutes later after dismantling the machine.
We lost there..
Drove to I.P (Parked at Harrah’s) to get ticket for Human Nature-CLV gave me her tix for Dennis & Judy.. the rest of the EC crew will showed up.
played at Harrah’s- noticed TB was playing LOTR’s because I couldn’t on my card- so I logged in a new name. The new 2 Towers is cheap.
It got to be 4pm but CLV was having too much fun so I did the D.L. myself and texted Bum to join me- it was horrible wings, some weird pressed hamburger meat sticks, nuts, toast and celery—I drank two cappuccinos, 2 PERRIER’S, BURYING THE NUTS IN A SIDE ZIPLOCK- OOPS CAP LOCK. ~~sheesh, God awful food. People come there to drink I guess.. it ain’t no Atlantic City, that fer sure. :>(
Bum showed. He was Margaritaed so no beer. CLV was hypnotized by a VP machine. We left for I.P. and I got my fun on dime Ultimate X and Double STP- Hit a deuces royal for 800 ($80)
Played Alice- the 4 sets window one- got 2 bonus rounds- cashed even/ those things will hurt you!
We came up w/ “ the Vortex(t)” which is short for Voice Of Reason text – TB said something about cashed out or holding on to my win- I said “well thank you for that sage advise, voice of reason”…
later he texted me some other big brotherly nonsense in case I got hypnotized-a V.O.R. text.. you maybe had to be there.
Human Nature ruled and rocked- we sat w/ Judy and Dennis- no one else came to our table. It’s a great show and our gang stayed outside after it was over while Bob Row tried to get me to bring the MPT monkey to the H.N. guys for a photo.
Rob took my card to Tahoe or somewhere- thanks, Rob
We goofed around at Harrah’s..Which means I played, he watched. I found what interested CLV for hours..it’s a secret but it’s radical.
Back to Rio and bed by 11:30pm.
MONDAY AUGUST 1
_________________________ I see The MPT was Sunday -- do not trust anything I say she said mistakenly
No walk Waaaaaaaaa- or maybe we did. I think we did walk.Casinoed ??? there are no notes
Moved to Orleans.
Room 1723 which, I was informed; is all prime numbers (ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzz)
I don’t have notes for Monday but we did run into Bard and Maggie at Orleans- I had very little time to get ready for the MPT. Meanwhile the sink clogged, the lights went out in the bathroom and I needed at LEAST 2 more pillows. Oh and the air was on full blasted with the knob not working so best I could do was close the drapes and shove the easy chair against the thing…. 2 flat, old, worn, dead little body towels.. GRRRRR.
I am not complaining I am just telling you..it was fine as I was not there and fell into bed each night. I like the place but more so because Bard and Bum were there and it saved them from getting me each morning.
This was the day of WSOP..wait~~~~
I mean, the MPT.. at Palazzo.
Bard and Maggie came w/ us (the morning and early afternoon is a black out to me.) MPT was 3pm but STARTED AT 4PM- RowanB caught me taking his sewing kit but Gawd was I bored after 20 minutes. We had Jackie as cocktail waitress and Harv as Master of ceremonies. I had a tip for Sinow and got to hug and kiss Bob (I think he hates it) Lucky for me, I was seated by the snacks to shut me up.
I went out first (3rd time so I am constant ) It's a garunteed prize.. girls of Golden gate calendar! score!
Couldn’t wait to smoke in the casino—found a nice quarter STP/ got a 3X multiplier and hit quads so used that money to play w/- cost me $20.00- They were up there 4 hours.
Came back and rescued Maggie. We walked the shopping area and played at Jimmy Choo’s ignoring the sale ladies knowing damn well we were not buyers. Every sales person was standing around.
I touched everything. (The beige suede’s for Fall are to die for) Later, in our travels we both saw a class act hooker wearing them at Cosmo.
Monday night is a blur- again no notes.
I broke even Sunday and Monday and was THRILLED. I do remember walking by a penny machine I’d never seen w/ Bum ahead of me and saying WAIT! Aztec Cows?!? I MUST play these Aztec cows/how could you not?!?- they’re COWS!!!!
And hit for $366.22 when almost the whole screen filled up w/ them on the 3rd spin.- never saw that type of machine before or after (at Orleans)
Orleans was great at wake up calls- I got one –
TUESDAY
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for 5am to meet Bard downstairs at nickel triple progressive which was $6,1XX.XX- no win. Bum was running a little late (burning the candle at both ends, Bum??!?)
We had a great walk, it’s so clean and beautiful out there, almost chilly at 6:45 am.
Bum Bard and Mags to Pawn Stars or Aliante to see Sue. I think the first thing she said was “Where’s Noahcat!?!?”…lol.
Bum drops me at 10:30 to Flamingo where I check in and get times for a slot tourney w/ CLV---Room 11080 w/ a nice Bellagio fountain view amid the tiny spots of Donny and Marie but you could see thru the window- don’t know how.
We messed the room up, ate my red licorice, drove to Cosmo via Bellagio—We checked at the slot club- they have extended the $100.00 FP to August - I asked kind of wise cracky “and what if I win?”
She said “Come back tomorrow..”
Oh really!?!?
They couldn’t be nicer.
I played $2.50 a pop on Little Shop of Horrors- I got a great bonus round for $277.45. (There are two right in front by windows by the Strip..)
I stopped playing- CLV lost and the FP is good for one whole year!
We just made the 1:30PM Gold Coast Meet and we weren’t first even. I got a table for 20 at the noodle bar and chatted w/ Slowpoke whom I adored and Judy showed up w/ her butt-plug trophy for MPT Bowling- Sat near Kip and CLV w/ Jon Terry and Bum near me- FEED ME SEYMOUR! I mixed up the tea w/ the soy sauce… shitballs. It was fun, food was good and well attended after goodbyes I just had to play those Deluxe Wheel w/ cheese on deuces- and got the wheel 5-play w/ 3 to the royal on dimes- well the royal filled in and everyone came one by one- two by two to see my $400.00 Royal.
I cashed $547.30 and tried the Rockin Olives which is heck-a-fun too- it’s the new Queen machine but way better…
Broke even on that.
Still early, CLV and I went to Cannery to see Sue Casey—she found me playing .02 cent 10-play Ultimate X—lost $100.00. We lost CLV to the Wheel Poker- we both played on her card.
Sue and I fell into a DREAMCARD trance. Nothing was paying. We were there til 7-ish. I lost $300.00 but got my low rolling on. Cindy got aces for $200.00- finally!
Sue has books for me and we hugged goodbye.. we were leaving when CLV spotted a sonic across the street- which meant I got instantly hungry which is so crazy cuz I know Sue has comps and the Victory
Café is good food! But we got dogs w/ chili and onion rings, CLV likes to drive into her food and drink (Dwinks)
—drove to Orleans, run into Bum walking into Orleans ( what are the odds?!?) He was off to somewhere.
CLV and I played wheel poker and quick quads- (shut up V.O.R Text) they only have them at the .25 cent level but I got dealt Q.Q.’s twice playing 5-play and some surprises surfing in the machine but tis a heady ride so I cashed at $616.00 and was thrilled. CLV outlasted me but not for long- I had to baled, bathing takes time….
Bed 11pm.
Bum wants to leave at 6am- crazy man…. LIEUtenant Dan!
Lieutenant DA-AN!—Bums’ good for a Forest Gump impression.
WEDNESDAY
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Bard comes w/ and again and major wonderful magical walk… not another living soul and the timing was perfect- earlier is better.
Bum needs to check in. I insist.
I have to hurry to be at Flamingo by 10:30—I am down in the casino when Bum texts me this : “come 2 door”
Er, um—there is no door in casino.
Open! He says
“Not in room” I text back—apparently, he grabbed 2 fluffy towels off a maid cart and knocked on the wrong door (1423 I think) in a boomin’ voice saying “Madam, Your Cabana boy is here..” LOL Nice thought/wrong room, Bum…
Helen Keller said of Mark Twain “Great Men are usually mistaken about themselves”
I get there (Flamingo right on time) got back to back sessions- I tank.. CLV scores the highest both times up and down the aisles- I checked.. I sucked.
I decided Maggie needed to see Human Nature- she doesn’t walk, she doesn’t gamble much, she’s a good egg, she loves Motown and this is her vacation too
OK, so CLV doesn’t want to walk or get sweaty-got the voucher at Flamingo while dissuading the person in front of me to not go to H.N. try The Impressionists..Legends Hey!..there is a Mean Michael Jackson..you’ll love it! Boothing telle me to get the tix seating locked in ASAP, we use the room (to potty) and get in the car—she back doors to Harrah’s and drops me off telling me to go up one floor- and I am instantly LOST in a hot parking garage- I blank. I am stunned like a slaughterhouse cow- I text her..”I am completely LOST! Help!” , not moving but the heat forces me in an elevator- thank God some 6th sense tells me to hit Monorail- and I venture out to the IP crossing- scared to death.. panic attack adrenaline floods my brain..I need a watcher at all times!!!!
Race to the box office, got seats- mission accomplished – CLV texts me she’s in Harrah’s (WTF!?!?) I text back U R PLAYING?!?!?
I’ll never find her now. Turns out she was Iphoning some e-mails waiting for me by the Mist-ers—never so glad to see anyone in my life (OK, well..not counting Sinow a mile away from Red Rock Canyon entrance)
We went right to Bellagio again for lunch w/ Barb, Matthew and Dan (FedoMalley) we had 12 minutes to play. I got a $145.00 quad on the 10 coin quarter progressive along w/ many straights and full houses cashing $245.00 before Olives.
Lump Crab salad, and those amazing Butternut squash torteli’s~~~~ yum—on the patio which was hot but lovely- I went to the ladies room to put toilet paper in my bra as sweat was pouring down between my breasts/belly slick (ick, I know)
It was 104 with no breeze and now i'm eating pasta. Once in a while the air condition from inside would sneak out and I'd go "Oh, wow.. dija feel that?"
—Later, I find out CLV did the same only in her butt crack as she has Kathy Griffin butt sweat.
We are so classy…huh? LMAO
Matthew gets 3 scoops of ice cream.
Meanwhile,
Barb ask where I was staying next (South Point) , got out her S.P. card, called her host and got me a suite for the two nights… OMG OMG! Thank you..OMG!
We parted thanking them for lunch and cooled down in the casino. I got dealt Aces w/ a 5, the drawn card was a 6. Machine locked up for $400.00
so I moved to the next machine and got aces w/ a kicker for $1,000 holding 2 aces.
Whoo-Hoo and
Holy Moley!!!
Now CLV’s machine gave her a quad too- all I know is I walked out of there with $1,6XX.00 more than I walked in with and a full happy belly.
Off to M- I suckered myself in to a Moroccan Hair Event at 4pm. I’m a Spa gal, not a Salon girl but they were giving a Louis Vuitton travel bag of Moroccan Hair Products away at the end I JUST KNEW I would win it- Bard was coming to get the HN Tix.
CLV and I had FP-- and my hair was a weeks worth of smoke, Red Rock sweat and oil—Anthony took me in- it cost $60.00 and I had to tip but I got Star hair and was allowed to pick out a full size Moroccan product.
Meh.
I will tell you the shampoo chairs are leather and have lumbar massagers in them…but hair is hair and I won’t ever do it again. CLV left and TB was in the Poker room-
I roamed around playing Double STP dimes and looking for sweet penny hits until Bum text me “what’s your pleasure” ..Hmm what IS my pleasure?!?
I got hungry and we settled on washing up and driving to Sunset Station.
The advantaged play/deal here was senior points and the POV/MRB $25.00 coupon for spending $50.00 at the steak house but my patience was wearing thin going to the rewards center to check on poionts, the bathroom to wash up and the steakhouse to learn we now had to go to the gift shop (Never seen it before.. Sunset has a gift shop!?!) to purchase a gift card for $25.00 and it would have $50.00 on it and ....well, ....I blew w/ all the steps involved..
God F-ing Damn it! Why don’t they just tell us to bring them the broom of the wicked witch!?!?~~ Dance, monkey, Dance!! I am screaming to no one in particular..
Bum points to a STP machine and tells me to sit and play while he goes through the hoops for us.
After a smoke and winning $48.00 I found my manners and my Zen center but I warned the waiter I was on the edge.
He heard me.
The Service was impeccable as was the food. Petite Filet butterflied, charred Pittsburg style w/ spinach sautéed w/ garlic while Bum got everything the waiter suggested: twice baked potato and bone in rib eye, onion soup to start.
Burp.
Everything was divinely graced.
Alice gave me $344.77- Holy Wonderland!!/ I picked all the right tea pots. We played some LOTRs and penny 10-play poker. Bum scouted for some machines Maggie liked. Back at Orleans the nickel trip progressive stands at $6,600.
THURSDAY AUGUST 4th
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Orleans Breakfast w/ Bard, Maggie and Bum. Gamble- lose.
Pack up for South Point. Stand in ridiculous line at South Point helping a Jersey couple form their day. I wasn’t able to cancel my standard room so we all used it for luggage while I plundered the bath products. We Bum-mobiled to Cosmo where again I won $209.00 on Little Shop Of Horrors. Saw Bard go batshit on some ignorant slot manager- He was tense and steaming but the ladies at the slot club knew what they were doing and smoothed his ruffle feathers we all played in the free slot tourney- Maggie was the top winner, I came in second for $25.00 and Bum’s machine broke so they gave him $10.00 in FP. (Figures, huh?) LOL
We all made money,
The parking there is lovely and civil- with red lights for full and green lights for empty and numbers of how many spots are available on each floor. Going and parking there is an event in itself..
Off to Ellis Island where we taught Bard and Maggie the game of Quick Quads- both Bard and Maggie won and quickly cashed. Bum got us all root beer. First and last time there for me. Ick. The next day Bum went back to use our FP—howja do Bum???
Back to S.P.—where I ignore the line and get my SUITE from Barb- top floor/ wider hallways room 2547- O’ MY!!! Kitchen, living room, dining room ,4 TVs!, turn the corner into a heavenly inset ceiling lighting, giant bedroom w/ Boise radio and huge 4 poster dream bed- marble bathroom the size of my Brooklyn apartment Bathroom w/ 2 or 3 doors (Toilet/ shower) / ginormous rounded tub, - I dance, I am THRILLED- Text everyone to meet here. Bum finds a jazz channel while I spread my stuff out- oh I want to use that bathtub!
Starving-
we go early to Gaetanos, salad, spaghetti and meat balls, crab-stuffed salmon (The grown-ups had wine) this place is consistently wonderful. Thanks to Bard and Bum.
XOXOXOOXXO TO MEN WHO FEED ME.
Decided to only play on TB’s card-- Never had a S.P. card- I can wait. TB will get tons of offers.
Hit a Chili Pepper penny machine for $279.00—Saw a woman hit for $3,000.00 on a penny machine..amazing!
I wasn’t winning and only wanted to jump around in that heavenly room so I baled- Bum went to find Bigfus downtown- I luxuriated in my SUITE/ played w/ all the lighting, robes and slippers- bath was as good as I thought it would be. Fluffy towels aplenty/ bath salts Ahhhhhhhhh
I caught a Larry David show before crossing over to the land of Nod- I felt like the princess and the pea- or Goldie Locks for this bed and this room was “jest right”- and the Boise alarm went off at 5am w/o my knowledge or permission-
You know the bed was so heavenly, that I turned it off after finding my glasses, the remote and climbed right back into bed sleeping til 6:30am?! Yay!
good for me.
Turn on my phone and RowanB has sent a photo of a diamond royal w/ the text : (Had to go back to AC to get a Royal) I take comfort in I am the sanest of my ECLVA group..
Bard was texting me- I was suppose to buy him a cup of coffee but let me tell you I put on 3 miles running around that suite- everything I needed was in another room. My hair goes in a pony tail and did I wash my face?
He says go to Seattle’s Best and turn around- he’ll be at the ATM.
Not Good.
Found him, he got ducks but still in a hole..we took a shot at Quick Quads w/ a cheesy wheel- nope. No luck.
Bum and Maggie came for free buffet- it was food. I didn’t like it. I couldn’t saw the bottom English muffin of my eggs Benedict but free is free.. I was tired but the impending doom of leaving tonight was clear on my mind.
Bum and Bard played LOTR- both cashed a Big Win (a big win is over $20.00) the bonuses are awesome, still love the Prancing Pony best
Showed Maggie Alice in Wonderland and caught 2 bonuses cashing out $198.75 on a twenty.
I semi-packed…boo-hoo-hoo..
Bum wanted to go to Cosmo to do more FP and tourney—so we did. We played LOTRs and I cashed $147.00 after almost burning through the whole hundy. (You have to score 100 points daily to enter) Cake walk.
As much as they tried to get more people in the tourney- there was only 3 of us , I was in the lead but Bum pulled ahead at the last 3 seconds.
Bum WON! Apparently, it’s upside down day then (LOL)
He takes $50.00 I take $25.00 in FP and we both cash playing Bonus poker to the good.
We toured the Spa and tennis courts, saw the tourney director waiting by some convention to applauded someone- there is amazing humoristic and wondrous Art scatter about everywhere at Cosmo.
We were going to Gold coast but took a drive to Buzz BBQ- where I ate more than Bum did. It was awesome.. Brisket and rib tips- w/ restaurant.com voucher it came to under $20.00.
My notes end here. I had til 8:30. I got aces on STP at G.C.- watched a new bonus round on Rockin Olives—Bum rushed me back to S.P. where I HAD to try that shower and refresh—packed, forced myself to leave Maggie bath products (LOL) and gave this amazing Suite up to Bard and Maggie- they’ll stay here tonight. Bard had set my sox monkey in the Penn & Teller fish bowl w/ a sign Bad Monkey.
They went back to Gaetanos for dinner again.
We played downstairs w/ no great hits. I played some 3-card and Life of Luxury hitting 2 bonus rounds.
Phooey- Bum waits by TSA. We share some popcorn and review the trip.
I brought back much more than I came with. More is good.
Bum mailed me back some stuff I accrued over the week.
I got it already
Walking in Red Rock was amazing- it’s really a joy. Friends make the vacation shared sweeter/can’t imagine doing Vegas on my own. Who would I high five?
South Point rules.
Sinows Rescue N Recovery rules, pretty sure you’ll make the T-shirt sponsorship next year, a solid bet.
10 coin quarters at Bellagio rule.
CLV’s drive-thru food & drink rule rocks.
Seeing Sue is always good.
Being Diamond rules too- insures a coffee-maker.
Bum ,
this is for you:
Apparently,
Alex Trebek injured his Achilles heel while chasing a thief who’d stolen cash, jewelry from his hotel room- No thanks to Watson who just stood by processing the whole thing.
Supercomputer, my a$$ :>)
