Humor - Rejected Blackjack Book Titles

As Anthony Curtis and some of you know, my book, "1536 Free Waters and Other Blackjack Endeavors - Finding Profit and Humor in Card-Counting" is scheduled for publication soon. I appreciate the advice that I received from the Las Vegas Advisor and the staff at Huntington Press. Thanks, all.

While coming up with a title for the book, I also had to determine the book classification. It was a tricky choice between “Games” and “Humor.” Since I could only pick one, I went with “Games”…adding “Humor” in the subtitle will hopefully be a catch-all for the other classification. Just so you know, I rejected these other titles in case the book was classified a different way:

In the Fiction area:
Fifty Additional Shades of Grey – My Life of S&M in Underground Casinos

Science Fiction:
The Real Hunger Games – 42 Straight Hours of Playing Blackjack While Eating Only a Half-Empty Tin of Altoids

Sports:
Playing Blackjack is More of a Sport Than 27 Events Played at the 2012 London Summer Olympics

History:
General Douglas MacArthur – Great Leader, But Really Shitty Blackjack Player

Parenting and Family:
Mommy, Why is Daddy Always at the Casino?

Travel:
Visit Mesquite, Nevada – But Watch Out for the Douche Bag Pit Manager at the Casablanca Casino Who Backed Me Off for Card-Counting Even Though I Was Losing $800 at the Time

Mystery:
The Angry Man Who Killed a Cocktail Waitress with a Nine of Diamonds

Reference:
“G-SHIT-KRICE-YOU-FRIGGIN-BUTTNUTT-I-CAN’T-BELIEVE-YOU-TOOK-THAT-CARD” and Other New Entries in the Webster Blackjack Dictionary

Law:
Keeping Chips Found on the Casino Floor – It’s Not Stealing If You Don’t Get Caught

Religion:
I Found Jesus – He Was Eating a Muffin in the Alley Between the Palazzo Hotel and the Imperial Palace Casino in Las Vegas

Literature:
Absence of Sense and Sensibility – Average Blackjack Players

Kids:
Stranger Danger – Stay Clear of That Wiggy Guy Who Asks, “Wanna See the Chips in My Pocket?”

Young Adult:
Stranger Danger – Stay Clear of That Wiggy Guy Who Asks, “Wanna See the Chips in My Pocket?”

Adult Women, Ages 18-25
Welcoming Strangers – No Need to Stay Clear of That Wiggy Guy Who Asks, “Wanna See the Chips in My Pocket?”

Trivia:
The Game of Blackjack Was Invented in 2009 in Kodiak, Alaska, and Other Lesser-Known Gambling Trivia

Politics:
Like It or Not, Americans, Your President is Black, Jack!

Diet & Health:
Morbidly Obese People Spotted at the Casino – Counting Cards Instead of Counting Calories

Art:
Mona Lisa – The Original Model for the Queen of Clubs

Self-Help:
You Suck – Why You Shouldn’t Sit Next to Me at the Blackjack Table

Pets:
My Dog, Newman, Was Spaded Seven Years Ago – But He is Still a Better Blackjack Player Than Many of You

Automotive:
My Car Has a Cracked Windshield and Faulty Transmission – But It is Still a Better Blackjack Player Than Many of You

Romance:
1536 Free Waters and the Clean-Up Required After Trysts with 1536 Vegas Prostitutes

Do you have any rejected Blackjack book titles of your own? If so, please share them in this forum.

Glen

Good luck on the book release.

Some of those titles are great.

Hygiene:
17 straight hours without a restroom break - why you should never grab that hot chair that just opened up.

Just a quick endorsement. This is a good book that we almost published at HP. Timing wasn't quite right and we were busy with the big poker books, but Glen had a lot of supporters in our acquisition group.

Anthony, what is your favorite book that you carry for organized crime?

Woodchippers, chainsaws, and concrete a beginners guide to body disposal.

What really happened to Jimmy Hoffa?

Prison pasta and how to make it.

Who's under Las Vegas, a stiff's guide.

Of Rats and Men is my favorite. Just a lot of good information in that one. I like the gambling chapter in Surviving the Mob, because I had to work first-hand on that one and I got to talk to a few guys from NYC who ran the games.

Thanks, Anthony, for the vote of confidence. However, when I tell the story to family and friends, it is:

"...I almost published at HP, but I decided the timing wasn't right!"

Glen

Two more titles submitted by friends:

Kid's book: Blackjack and the Beanstalk

Murder Mystery: Blackjack the Ripper

Glen, very clever and witty. Good luck on the release. I've give up on blackjack, It's cost me too much money and have moved on to other games that are costing me money too. I'll be looking for your book. Will it be listed here for sale?

Think you just found the Forward title.

Now if you can get anthony to pen it.