Contributing expert, the inimitable Max Rubin, answers:
I, for one, am shocked -- shocked! -- that a couple visiting Vegas had too many drinks and now can’t remember where they were!
Whatever casino it was (that must have been some hot-and-heavy friskiness!) probably has a new owner by now (only a few gaming companies are left) and if it’s changed hands, you’re off the hook. If not, I still wouldn’t worry, because the casino security goons have much bigger fish to fry these days, and most of their time is spent figuring out how to stop terrorists, and how to keep from getting caught when they inflict terror on dastardly card counters and threaten them with beat-downs in the back rooms.
If you happen to get nabbed, you’ve still got a perfectly good excuse, which I’ve used many times. Just say, "We were drunk, so it’s not our fault." This one never works if you’re trying to explain something to your wife, but since your wife was in on the caper -- and where, exactly, does a guy go to find a wife who likes to get blind drunk and engage in some serious fooling around in public? I thought that one was restricted to singles and those who wish they were. But I digress -- you can both plead temporary comped-drink insanity and probably walk away free citizens.
My advice? Run and gun (almost) like you did in the past, but if she goes into heat and you start to feel some heat from the rented badges, get a room (I hope it’s comped). And tip the maid.
Max is the author of Comp City -- A Guide to Free Vegas Vacations, now in its second edition.
