Question of the Day - 25 December 2023

A morning clear,

A word of cheer,

A bit of love from someone near,

A little gift from one held dear,

Best wishes for the coming year.

With that attended to, here's another QoD rerun that the Thanksgiving Day repeat, on using a 2-for-1 dinner coupon on a first date, brought to mind. This one is even more extreme and it seems (somehow) appropriate that we repost it on Christmas, a day that stands for generosity and joy and peace. We answered it 2008 and the details (hostel, prices, etc.) are instructive of the time; we haven't updated anything.

And though we've often wondered what happened to the poor wife and encouraged her, both publicly and privately, to let us know how her trip went, we never heard back from her. We hope ... well ... suffice it to say that where's there life, there's hope.

Here's the question.

The only complete sentence my husband of two years ever utters is, "If it costs money, the answer is no." He’s so cheap that he sounds like a hundred hungry baby birds. We’re flying in to L.A. (on his parents’ dime) to attend his sister’s wedding and I’m dying to visit Las Vegas for the first time. We can borrow his brother’s car with a full tank of gas that’ll almost get us there and back and I’m willing to basically starve when we’re out there. The problem is somewhere to stay. Can you tell me what’s the absolute most inexpensive (free?) rock-bottom way to spend, say, two nights?

The obvious solution to your situation is … well, never mind. Our mamas always taught us never to interfere in another couple’s nuptial, uh, bliss.

So to answer your question, it’s good that you’ll have wheels. Without them, your only choices would be to stay up all night in casinos or sleep in ditches or storm-drain tunnels. With a car, all you have to do is find a safe place to park and you can get away with sleeping in it a couple of nights.

You can try public parking lots -- they line the avenues of Las Vegas -- but you’ll have to steer clear of Las Vegas cops to avoid a citation for loitering. You can park inside casino garages, but casino security is strict; if you’re found "living" in your car, you’ll be asked to leave. If you’re nabbed a second time, you could be read the trespass act and 86’d or detained till a Metro peace officer is summoned to write you up for loitering.

So the way to play this is not to get caught. Don’t leave your car running for a/c or heat, which could make this option dicey during the heat of summer or on cold winter nights. If you listen to music, keep the volume down to a level only audible within your car and run the stereo without the engine on. Having tinted windows helps. And for God’s sake, don’t have wild sex. If that car’s rockin’, someone’s bound to come knockin’.

Of course, this certainly isn’t the most comfortable option and you’ll need to find a place to change clothes, perform at least minor routine ablutions, and otherwise attend to daily hygiene. You can wash up, to a certain extent, in casino men’s/women’s rooms; it’s not like there aren’t enough on the Strip, downtown, and out in the neighborhoods to go around. However, you’ll look a little suspicious carrying a suitcase, as will a guy with a shaving kit, into a public casino bathroom with you. A woman will get by a little easier with a huge purse and a metrosexual with a man bag. But you can go only so far there.

Fortunately, numerous public pools and recreation centers in Las Vegas offer shower facilities. Daily rates run around $1-$3 and discount passes are available for multiple visits. These facilities are maintained and operated by city and county agencies. The closest ones to the Strip and downtown are the Baker Pool, 1100 E St. Louis Ave. (near Maryland Pkwy.), 702/229-6395; the Cragin Pool, 900 Hinson Ave. (near Charleston and Valley View), 702/229-6394; and the Cambridge Recreation Center, 3930 Cambridge St. (near Flamingo Rd. and Maryland Pkwy.), 702/455-7169.

Now, if it’s not too cold and you can borrow some camping equipment, you can pitch a tent, crawl in, and stretch out in a sleeping bag. Just head into the desert (out West Charleston Blvd. will get you there in about 15 miles) and pick a spot. This is pretty primitive and you’re outta doors, but it is free.

If that’s a little scary, the closest public camping to Las Vegas is the aptly named 13-Mile Campground at the 13-mile marker on West Charleston Blvd. about halfway between the Beltway (Highway 215) and the entrance to Red Rock Canyon’s Scenic Loop Road. Driving west on Charleston, roughly 13 miles west of Las Vegas Blvd., turn left onto Moenkopi Road and drive south into the desert hills; you can see the campground from the top of a hill before you get to the end of the road. Here, you’ll find 55 individual camping sites, plus 24 walk-in and 10 group sites. There are restrooms with fresh water (no showers), grills, and picnic tables. It’s -- gulp! -- $10 per night per vehicle.

‘Course, if your Scrooge is willing to spring for $10, he might go another $6. The USA Hostel Las Vegas, 1322 Fremont St., 702/385-1150 or 800/550-8958, is located eight blocks south of downtown right on Fremont Street. It’s not the greatest neighborhood, and as a woman you might feel a little nervous on your own, but the hostel also has a pool and hot tub (which are actually up and running some of the time), free coffee and tea, and free wi-fi. It can be noisy with young partiers staying up late, but you can get a bed for $16, which is about as little money as you’ll shell out in this town, even if it’s not in a private room.

And for another $10 or $15, you can get your own room at one of the fringe motels found in the outskirts of downtown (along Las Vegas Blvd. S. between Charleston Blvd. and Sahara Avenue and along E. Fremont Street from about 8th Street east) and out on Boulder Highway. Though all these motels are located in some pretty rough territory and leave quite a bit to be desired in the cleanliness, godliness, and comfort departments, they’re all better than a car, campground, or hostel. Prices at these places start at $25 or so on weeknights and can go up to $35 or $40 on Friday and Saturday nights.

Your best bet in renting a room at one these motels is to drive down Las Vegas Blvd. or out Fremont Street and visit them in person. Many don’t take reservations or even answer their phones when -- or if -- they ring.

Before handing over your dough, ask to inspect the room you’ll be staying in. If it’s not permitted, walk next door. If it is, make sure the heat or air-conditioning works. Check the windows to see that they lock securely; the door should have a knob lock and a chain, and a deadbolt is best of all. You might have to take the room regardless of its flaws, but if you point them out to the front desk clerk, you might be able to bargain down the price a little. Or another room might appear.

Over the years, the least expensive digs in this category have been at the Ogden House (600 Fremont St., 702/385-5200), operated by Jackie Gaughan’s El Cortez. It’s clean, simple, cheap, and quiet, used as an overflow lodging when the El Cortez is sold out; rates run at $25-$30 weekdays and $35-$50 weekends.

Ambassador East (916 E. Fremont St., 702/384-8281) is also very cheap, though a little scarier than the Ogden House, at $30/$40 weekdays/weekends.

As for food, you don’t have to starve. If your skinflint will let you spend $5 a day, go to the Terrible’s breakfast buffet around 10:30 a.m. (it closes at 11), where you can fill up with enough food to hopefully last you for 24 hours.

Good luck, in Vegas and life, and please, let us know how it all turns out.