Category: Lifestyle & Travel Tips

I need to warn you right upfront what I am about to share is so shocking, so disturbing frankly, I think it’s a sign that the Empire is crumbling. That the Republic may not withstand this assault on all we hold dear. Prepare yourselves, people, it’s gonna be rough.

Here it is. I attended two different Thanksgiving events this year. One on Thursday at a friend’s church and another on Saturday at a friend’s house. And this is the shocker. There were no MASHED POTATOES or GRAVY! AT EITHER EVENT! Stop the music! EMTs, I think someone needs help up front. I mean MY GOD, is there any hope we as a nation will survive this travesty of culinary injustice?

A good friend counseled me afterwards suggesting I go to KFC. I’m happy to report that at least there our hallowed institutions have not been destroyed.

Please join me in my noble crusade: mashed potato nation/gravy nation. Interesting. I’m getting calls from Idaho already.

Next! It’s gift card season. Wanna fight foodflation? It’s simple math, folks. You’re already couponing, stacking, doing senior discount day (you are that old, right?).

Well, it’s that special time of year to grab the gift-card holiday bonanza gold ring, so get crackin’.

Costco’s is particularly lucrative. Do you eat at or spend at a particular venue all during the year? Your favorite restaurant chain? Movies? Uber? If you eat, imbibe, or spend regularly, they’re offering 20% or 25% discount cards! Load up!

Sweet is getting that special hot fudge sundae at 25% off. Or the steak or seafood special. It’s easy money. There’s only one caveat. Don’t LOSE them. Use a gift card wallet. Or an old recipe box.

Now onto my next grouse, these kids today.

I’m at the local mall heading to my car and what do I spy? A Silver American Express Business Card lying on the ground. Shopping spree? Nah. Being the good Samaritan, I pick it up. It has the person’s name, so I look up the number. I call and get a hang up. I send a text ID’ing myself and that I have their card. No response. I call AGAIN, leaving a message.

The address happens to be in my neighborhood on the way home, so I figure I’ll drop it off. It’s a design firm and the glass front door is locked, but I can see folks inside, so I knock.

A young woman comes to the door, smiling, so I’m pretty sure she knows who I am. She just cracks open the door and asks, “Where did you find it?”

Oh, I think, so you did read the text or listen to the voicemail.

But no “Hi” or “C’mon in.” She snatches the AMEX card out of my hand, says “Thanks,” closes the door, and turns away.

Wow. These kids today.

I mean, I wasn’t expecting a reward, but … I guess I’ll get karma points.

Bag stuffed with goodies after a coupon run, (like a kid coming back from Halloween or the Midway), I marvel at all the T-shirts, coffee cups, dice, playing cards, hats, and more that I’ve collected on my trip to Vegas. Keep your Gucci. I like free.

Yeah, I’m one of those guys taking the soaps and shampoo. But what really gets me going is the twice-daily room service in the five-star towers at Wynn and Encore literally sweeping it all into the cloth laundry bags along with … well … they haven’t gone out of their way to invite me back, but I don’t think it’s the Super Swag runs.

But I digress. I love to collect. I’m into vintage LPs and 45s, Do Not Disturb signs, seashells, everything Japanese (even anime, though I stop at Hello Kitty), and of course anything Vegas.

My question to you is: What’s your favorite Vegas swag?

Come on, I know you sneak some soap and shampoo home and love to sing Bon Jovi, Taylor, Lady Gaga, or Rod Stewart while soaping up from the Cosmopolitan.

Anyway, I considered a Top Five, but it’s even hard to stop at the 10, so here goes.

Soaps and shampoos from Downtown Grand, Rio, and especially Wynn.

Long-gone-casino swag: Crazy Girls coffee cups from the Riviera (you know the one) and my Mirage bathrobe.

Wynn bathrobe and leather long shoe horn. No not for shoes, silly … think kinky!

Circa Stadium Swim towels, (mine cost me $10,000; Superbowl Stadium Swim for 12), though I passed on Circa’s replica gold bars of their Legacy Club Million in Gold Display … a must-see, BTW.

Did I mention my Vegas coaster and matchbook collection and Vegas/Reno/Atlantic City dice collection? Or Shaq’s Super Bowl party at XS at the Wynn? The music was hot — and the swag was off the charts.

Or my favorite LVA MRB online printed free lap-dance coupon I never used? Like the whale in Atlantic City who kept losing millions and on the trip where he won millions, he kept the check in his wallet to show his buds he was a winner? Well, I didn’t win millions and not cash the check (I always cash the check!), but I kept the lap dance coupon, because I couldn’t imagine asking for a dance and handing over a coupon.

Besides, it’s really number two. My number one Vegas swag? The Stardust “Maid service, please” door hangar. I still remember looking down at the pool, wishing I had one of those poolside rooms (before they plowed it under to create Resorts World).

Oh, the stories those rooms could tell!

What’s your favorite swag or swag story?

Best swag story wins a Bobby Vegas T-shirt, the best swag of all.

On a North Carolina Barrier Island, true pirates abandoned horses hundreds of years ago and their descendants still roam. There, I collect seashells, bags full, then haul them back to my lair, happy in my discoveries and tickled by my finds.

I’m a lover of old vinyl. Searching through the dusty worn $1 bins for that elusive find, I saw Ahmad Jahmal’s One. It’s worth $25. A great jazz album or an old Four Tops in near mint condition. Nice.

And in Vegas, I search for that elusive golden moment where all the cards come up hearts or spades. Diamonds are fine too and no, I don’t hate clubs.

And having researched the venue and stacked my deals and coupons, I’ve tilted the odds in my favor, so the winning is just the confirmation. It’s “just a game” for me, less about the amounts I’ve won and more about the adventure. Though the money doesn’t hurt either.

I’ve found that this is what I love — learning a new field, finding some valuable knowledge, applying it and hopefully walking away a winner, then sharing that tale with you. These things leave me satisfied.

Searching for hidden values. Discovering a silver dish in a thrift store. Not quite as adventurous as Black Beard, but a 50/50 matchplay will do fine for me in 2025.

What do you search for? And why? Why do you come to Vegas? To pretend to be a high roller? Or maybe you actually are and just want to live it out guilt free. Your favorite performer’s incredible show? The exotic dining? A sexual fantasy fulfilled? For the whole experience?

Which games do you choose over others? What’s the psychology behind your game choice? The tight win potential of blackjack? The camaraderie of craps?

I like video poker. It’s clean, clear, thoughtful, absorbing. I can play at my own speed and am not at risk to the whims of a roller calling out stupid plays.

I really like craps, but the style of play and the decision tree don’t work well for me.

I’m way too transparent to bluff, so I’m not attracted to poker.

Moving right along to news of the day. With the media all over the Vegas crash, the LVCVA has come out with an embarrassingly awful ad campaign. They still don’t get it. Not surprised at all.

Vegas was once a mecca for many things, an adult Disney World, and most folks willingly came hoping for a score, ready to party and play. But when the hustles got so strong and things got tight at home, well, paying $75 to park and walk in the door just left a bad taste.

Will the house learn? Based on their track records, I don’t have a lot of faith in corporate types making good decisions. But Vegas still has ways to play. For me, rule one is simple: Avoid the Strip.