As I wrote last week, Bonnie and I recently returned from a comped cruise on the Norwegian Dawn. Laundry service was included in the package, and on one particular night both of my long pants had been sent to the laundry. I had expected the laundry to be returned prior to dinner, but such was not the case. I had some clean Bermuda shorts, but no long pants.
There are two main dining rooms on the Dawn — the Venetian and the Aqua. The Venetian is larger and has windows overlooking the bow of the ship, but the restaurants themselves share the same galley and have identical menus. As far as most of the passengers are concerned, the two dining rooms are equivalent.
The wording in the “Freestyle Daily” (the newsletter which lists when all the activities on the ship will take place) says, “Shorts are permitted in all outlets except Venetian and Le Bistro.” Bonnie interprets this to mean that since the Venetian and Aqua are equivalent dining options, if shorts aren’t allowed in one then they aren’t allowed in the other either. I interpret this to mean that the Aqua wasn’t specifically listed in the venues that excluded shorts so therefore they allowed shorts.
Bonnie wanted to “settle this” by asking beforehand at the Aqua whether they would allow shorts. I told her absolutely not! It makes no sense to me to allow them an extra opportunity to rule against my desires. It’s far better, in my opinion, to show up in shorts with my Freestyle Daily in hand. If they tell me I can’t wear shorts, I will show them the rule that says I can. They can take it as high as they wish but the printed rule is very clear. (Well, if the captain came down and said, “Sir, if you continue to insist on being served here we will drop you off at the next port, Roatan, and you can find your own way back to New Orleans” I would back down. But I very much doubted if it would ever come to that.) It could be that beginning on the next cruise the rule reads “except Aqua, Venetian, and Le Bistro,” but that’s not how it reads this cruise. (In my opinion, Cagney’s Steakhouse, which is the nicest dining facility on this ship, should also have a “no shorts” rule. But it doesn’t. I have no idea why.)
When I have a disagreement with someone and we “argue,” I try to do so graciously and politely — yet firmly. Being rude and/or antagonistic is a way that can lead to winning the battle but losing the war. Usually — certainly not always — I succeed. Bonnie hates these kinds of confrontations; whether I’m right or wrong; whether I win or lose. She would rather go along with the program and go out of her way not to make waves. She sometimes gets embarrassed by my “attitude problem.”
Professionally, this attitude problem has stood me in good stead. Most casinos don’t intentionally put out excellent opportunities. To find good deals, you need to look between the cracks. In casinos, their basic program is that the players lose. I don’t like that program. Going along with that program isn’t a way to come out ahead. So I regularly look for exceptions and sometimes find them. And when I do find them, and I think the exceptions are to my benefit, I take advantage of them for as long as they exist.
As a practical matter, the Aqua is only a small step up quality-wise, from the buffet — where I would be welcome to wear shorts. Still, I prefer the Aqua and the rules allow it, why not get what I prefer?
Also as a practical matter, it makes sense for me to choose my battles. If I judge that Bonnie is REALLY, REALLY going to be upset by me having such a discussion with the Aqua management, I’ll skip going to the restaurant that night. After all, it’s our honeymoon cruise and this is no time for a fight. (We actually got married in May, but she wasn’t healthy enough to go cruising then. We declared this two week vacation to be out “make up honeymoon.”)
If I judge that Bonnie will only be mildly irritated but accepts these arguments as “part of the Bob package,” then I’ll go ahead as planned. While Bonnie was initially put off by my apparel, this time she was the one who agreed to laugh it off. She just shook her head, took my arm, and said, “Let’s go to the Aqua.”