As we reported elsewhere, the state of Florida has a serious problem with illegal casinos. Lawmakers have been generally unwilling to take this bull by the horns. One laudable exception is state Sen. Clay Yarbrough (R). Following the lead of state Attorney General James Uthmeier, Yarbrough is looking to seriously upscale the penalties on those who operate rogue slot parlors.
This gets to the crux of Florida’s enforcement problem. As long as running a gambling den is just a misdemeanor, it will be an understandably low priority for the not-so-long arm of the law. In addition to making operating a gambling house a felony, those who work in them would face felony counts for repeat offenses. And people who rent to outlaw operators would also have felony counts meted out. Smugglers of large numbers of slot machines are targeted for prosecution as well under the Yarbrough bill. Considering that some slot dens advertise blatantly in the local newspaper, Yarbrough would zap that, too.
This is all very much to the good, as is Yarbrough’s focus on OSB. Anybody offering it other than the Seminole Tribe would be eligible for prosecution. In addition to protecting the tribe’s compacted monopoly on sports betting, it’s a warning shot against the rogue’s gallery of Kalshi, Polymarket, FanDuel, DraftKings, Fanatics, etc., that is swarming the South with prediction-market wagering. Bravo, senator.
Where’s the bad? In addition to praiseworthy prioritization of gambling-related crime, Yarbrough dabbles in naked racism, red meat for a red state. His bill would abolish any requirement for state regulators to appoint anyone to the Florida Gaming Control Commission who would “reflect Florida’s racial, ethnic, and gender diversity.” In other words, Yarbrough would remake the FGCC into an all-white, all-male bastion of privilege. Ditto this odious provision: “… it would remove consideration of ‘minority vendors’ and ‘minority residents’ in distribution of slot machine licenses, and would also strike the current requirement to report to the Gaming Control Commission regarding its efforts to hire members of minority groups.” Racism doesn’t get much more blatant than that.
Therein lies the ugliness. Who thought we would need to be fighting these battles in the supposedly enlightened mid-21st century? Like so many politicians, Yarbrough comes off as an arrogant little prick who needs to have some humility knocked into him. (We’re old enough to be his dad, so we can say that.) Focus on crime, senator, not on skin color. Let’s hope the amendment process keeps the good and deletes the bad. The ugliness is Yarbrough’s responsibility.
Speaking of prediction markets … They tend to be amoral sinkholes that would take action on the crucifixion of Jesus Christ, if only it where happening now. They’re also basically unregulated, which means you have little more recourse than with Lefty and his goons down at the corner. Case in point, Polymarket. It was only too happy to take wagers on our recent panty raid in Venezuela. However, in a hair-splitting move worthy of the White House itself, now Polymarket argues that bombing and killing Venezuelans, and abducting dictator Nicolas Maduro doesn’t qualify as an “invasion.” Semantics aside, this is a blatant example of the hooliganism that unrestrained prediction markets have loosed on what used to be an orderly gambling industry. And Polymarket is richer in welshed bets to the tune of $10.5 million.
We defer to a disgruntled Polymarket customer: “Polymarket has descended into sheer arbitrariness. Words are redefined at will, detached from any recognised meaning, and facts are simply ignored. That a military incursion, the kidnapping of a head of state, and the takeover of a country are not classified as an invasion is plainly absurd.” Then again, what did you expect from a company run by a bunch of scofflaws?
One of the biggest states for gambling is Oklahoma, home to scores of casinos and slot routes. In a blatant fuck-you to his own constituents, Sen. James Lankford (R) wants to keep Sen. Mike Crapo‘s tax hike on gamblers in place. As you will recall, it makes winnings not only 100% taxable but exempts only 90% of losses. Lankford allowed that the change is “not unrealistic” and “pretty minor.” But he’s against it. Why? Just because, apparently. If we had to guess, it would be that Lankford is one of those dickwads who look down their nose on gamblers. He probably figures you deserve to have the IRS sock it to you. Let’s hope voters sock it to him at the next election.
While it thought it was ending the old year on high note, grabbing a New York City casino license, Bally’s Corp. is entering 2026 in a volley of disgrace. Its two Rhode Island casinos saw a 3% revenue decline last month. What’s worse is the way Bally’s Casino in Chicago is evidently being run. It’s the Windy City’s new hot spot for crime. Not only was one patron robbed in the parking garage, an employee was beaten up (and robbed for good measure) inside the casino proper. Ex-dealer Steve Zaldua says he saw “patrons harassing dealers and, in some cases, threatening to kill them.” Ditto fisticuffs on the casino floor. What was Bally’s response to its concerns? It fired him.
Zaldua describes Bally’s approach to problem customers as “See no evil, hear no evil.” Bally’s admitted to having a basically do-nothing security forced but otherwise stonewalled on the issue. The sort of conduct that Zaldua alleges wouldn’t fly for a minute in Las Vegas, where Bally’s has pretensions of building a megaresort. One also shudders to think of this laissez-faire policy toward crime being allowed to fester at Bally’s Chicago and eventual Bally’s New York. Regulators for the state of Illinois need to debrief Zaldua and possibly levy some serious fines on Bally’s, if warranted. Nothing gets Soo Kim‘s attention like having to spend money.
Bally’s has also taken it upon itself to act as a DIY version of ICE. An asylum seeker who made the mistake of gambling at Medinah Temple had his winnings denied him by management. After some adverse media attention, Bally’s coughed up the money. According to WBBM-TV: “He presented his legal, valid limited term Illinois driver’s license, but didn’t receive a dime. He said Bally’s has paid him several times in the past, but not now.” We know Bally’s is perennially hard up for money but this is absurd. Maybe old Soo is trying to score brownie points with Kristi Noem, but why? Bally’s has offered the unfortunate man a free dinner but, if it was us, we wouldn’t accept. Anyway, if you want an excuse to avoid Medinah Temple, this is better than most.
On the subject of mistakes … We made one by watching Marty Supreme last night. This glorification of a weasel is preposterously melodramatic and feels like it’s nine hours long. It’s also so predictable it’s as though director Josh Safdie thought you’d never seen a movie before. If you go (and we advise against it), watch for an unrecognizable Penn Jilette as a shotgun-toting, racist yahoo. See how we worked that nifty Vegas angle in there?
At Bally’s Atlantic City, we only saw two people taken away in handcuffs in 2025, one by Atlantic City police, and one by Bally’s security people.
Racism was built in to the rules in Florida. Removing racist requirements does not equal racism.