Liar, liar, pants on fire. That’s what we say to Atlantic City casino executives who predict the coming of the Apocalypse is smoking is banned in their premises. First-quarter gross operating profits were up even by pre-pandemic standards, which hardly makes it sound as though the sky is about to fall. GOPs were 63% over last year and 79% higher than 2019. The downside is that the prosperity was largely confined to four casinos, three usual suspects (Borgata, Hard Rock Atlantic City and Ocean Casino Resort) and one overachiever (Tropicana Atlantic City). Everybody else posted lower GOPs than in 1Q19. And Bally’s Atlantic City recorded a modest loss—$8.5 million—in 1Q22. Borgata pocketed $46 million, Hard Rock made $27 million, Ocean bagged $5.5 million while Tropicana took home $20 million. (Ocean had the highest hotel occupancy, 81.5%, while Golden Nugget brought up the rear at 41.5%. That’s a lot of empty rooms. If you want a cheap room, try Resorts Atlantic City‘s average $106/night, while Ocean’s $209/night is the priciest.)

Sometime today, Chicago Mayor Lori Lightfoot (D) is expected to ramrod her choice of Bally’s Corp. through the City Council. Why the unseemly haste? Lightfoot desperately covets Bally’s $40 million in upfront money to prop up the Windy City’s tottering civic budget, $306 million in the red, although some experts say the math doesn’t add up. Worse yet, Lightfoot knows it, judging from her attempt to jack up the property-tax assessment on the Bally’s Tribune site. It would be levied at $125 million … permanently. (So much for depreciation.) According to The Real Deal, “While Bally’s and owners of at least 25 percent of it could object to higher valuations, they couldn’t argue that it’s less than any amount below the minimum.”

In return, Bally’s would be allowed to slide on Lightfoot’s 30% minority-owned contracting demand, to say nothing of her 10% women-owned contracting edict. A “good faith effort” will now suffice. Also, controversy has not died down regarding Lightfoot’s designation of Medinah Temple as the temporary-casino site, in an apparent attempt to reward a george campaign donor. Said Zoning Committee Chairman Tom Tunney, an opponent of the rushed vote, “Even though Medinah is empty, it’s in the middle of a very congested area. They’re saying that there’s plenty of parking around the Medinah Temple because Medinah itself doesn’t have any parking. But parking was there before Medinah. So the question, in my opinion, is what’s the utilization rate right now? There’s a liquor moratorium. So the ordinance is going to exempt the casino from local liquor moratoriums. That’s a problem.”

It’s only May but we have to give the nod to The Cosmopolitan of Las Vegas. Outgoing owner Blackstone Group graced all employees with $5,000 bonuses, an incredibly generous gesture. Blackstone certainly didn’t have to do it but they did and we are grateful. In addition to rewarding years of faithful service, the payout also provides a “soft landing” for anyone displaced by incoming owner MGM Resorts International (which enjoyed spineless approval by the Nevada Gaming Commission). Does Blackstone know something we don’t? Are big job cuts coming? Given Las Vegas‘ recent history (as in post-2000), we’re betting on ‘yes.’

According to The Associated Press, “joyous bedlam” broke out at the Cosmo when the news filtered to employees of their unexpected payday. Given that the megaresort employs roughly 5,400 staffers, we’re talking about a $27 million largesse, “george” by any measure. As Chief People Officer Daniel Espino put it, “It’s you, every single day, that makes a difference. Whether you clean the rooms, cook the food, are dealing cards, serving drinks, at the front desk.” As for Blackstone, it now takes its $1.6 billion sale price for the Cosmo and plows it into Crown Resorts, which could desperately use some good karma these days.