Rest in Peace, Bonnie

June 3, 1943 – June 17, 2026

A few weeks ago, I posted that Bonnie recently had a stroke. Before that blog was published, Bonnie had another stroke. And this time she didn’t survive it. 

Over the past two months, her entire body started gradually failing. She was in a lot of pain. The doctors couldn’t isolate what the problems were other than a general “body shutting down.” She needed to be on ever-increased doses of morphine at the end. 

All of us who loved her were sad when she finally passed, but relieved her pain was over. None of us thought she could recover and hearing her moan from the pain was heart-wrenching.

She died at home. We had hospice nurses and other help coming over, but most of the time it was just her daughter and/or me being there. Bonnie was scheduled to move into a hospice the next day but didn’t last long enough to get there.  

We had previously arranged for cremation services to be done by the Neptune Society. When we notified the hospice nurses that she had passed, they sent a nurse over to verify the death.  That nurse then called the Neptune Society who came and took away the body. They put her into a body bag and wheeled her out on a gurney.

I’ve read enough novels to know that whenever somebody dies, the police come over and question everybody. I was the only one with her when she died. The police didn’t come over this time. She was seriously ill at the end and there was nothing suspicious about her death, so the police weren’t even notified.

I then opened up some wine with Bonnie’s daughter and her fiancé, and told “Bonnie stories” for a couple of hours. We laughed and cried. It was pretty therapeutic for all of us. Since I’ll be the primary speaker at the memorial service for Bonnie, what we talked about that night gave me good ideas as to what to say at the service.

Possibly some of you don’t know, but Bonne and I weren’t officially married. We went through a service in front of God and witnesses, but never filed the papers. Bonnie’s previous husband of 47 years had been career military, and Bonnie would lose a variety of military benefits were she to remarry. So officially we didn’t, but we presented ourselves to the world as husband and wife and most people assumed we were actually married. It wasn’t a huge secret that we weren’t, but more people didn’t know than did.

After the memorial service, Bonnie’s ashes will be laid to rest at the Veterans Memorial Cemetery in Boulder City next to those of Fred Meiwald, the only husband she ever officially had. I will be there front and center to witness it. Fred and I never competed with each other for Bonnie’s affections. Dating married women was never my style. Plus, I was married to Shirley until after Fred died, and cheating on my wife wasn’t my style either.

For some time after Bonnie’s death, my phone rang regularly with people saying, “I’m so sorry. I don’t know what to say.” I cried through the first dozen or so of those — and then started crying less as time went by. 

I know there are people who haven’t gotten the word and for quite some time into the future will ask me about how Bonnie is. Other widows and widowers have gone though this previously. Now it’s my turn. Can’t say I’m looking forward to it, but I’m not actually dreading it. It’s definitely coming and I’ll learn to deal with it as I go.

I’ve had many shortcomings through the years. There are readers of my blog who like to regularly remind me of that. Still, Bonnie is something I did right. Dozens of people have told me recently, “I assume you know, but Bonnie loved you very much.” I did know, and it was mutual, and I’m grateful to be reminded that she felt that way and others knew it.

Most of you won’t be in Vegas for her memorial service and/or aren’t close enough to us for you to feel you want to attend. I’ve notified a lot of people, but I’m sure I must have missed some. I’ve not been myself these days. If you wish to attend, you’re welcome. No RSVP is necessary.

Friday, August 7, 2026, 11:20 a.m. in the chapel of the Southern Nevada Veterans Memorial Cemetery, 1900 Veterans Memorial Drive, Boulder City.

After the service, there will be a luncheon at the home of Richard and Mary Markgraf, 811 Mission Drive, Henderson. It is about ¼ of a mile west of the 11 freeway (the “only” way back to Las Vegas or Henderson from Boulder City) at the College Drive offramp. Don’t show up here before 12:30. Food will be served and if you wish to bring a salad or dessert, it will be warmly appreciated.

There will be a “pass the microphone” opportunity at the luncheon and anyone who has a memory of Bonnie to share will be welcome to do so.